As we grow older, we often get hardened and toughened by life. That toughness is often not a sign of strength but a facade to hide our fears, shame, and vulnerability. It takes a lot of courage to trust and hope again. Hopefully when the right moment comes, I’ll have the courage it takes to make a step forward, to be beautifully vulnerable and hope without hesitation.
— Tobias van Schneider (on side projects)
yes they do, just that sometimes it feels too long
We’ll do whatever just to stay alive
Well the way I feel is the way I write
It isn’t like the thoughts of the man who lies
There is a truth and it’s on our side
Dawn is coming
Open your eyes
Look into the sun as the new days rise
Reminder to self: look up
I often wonder why I must battle against unwanted negative emotions and feelings within me. I want to always wear a genuine smile on my face, I don’t choose to be negative, except for those moments I fall weak and give in.. I’m human. Yet even with the deep constant joy I have in The Lord, and sometimes contagious joy, I feel a layer of struggle within me.. and often, I have to face it so it doesn’t manifest into something worse through ignorance. Sometimes, ignorance is not bliss. I have to pray it out, process it, and proclaim Truth into my life. And sometimes that’s hard to do when it’s happening over and over again, but that’s the Battle.
I am told that I have a happy face. I agree, I think it’s one of many traits God created me with. I like to imagine He took his giant magnificent paintbrush and painted me with the color, HAPPY, PASSION and EXCITEMENT. If you know me well, I can get pretty excited and passionate…. Heh… But sometimes, these emotions when crossed with negativity can transform into MAD, APATHY, and DULLNESS. I want to reject it so badly. As I grow older, I see I am able to withstand it better and better defend the characteristics God designed me with. Though when I grow super weary, I cry out with lost Hope. But amongst those deep emotions, I hold onto a tiny hope that tells me the struggle is worth it. It’ll be worth the wait, the pains that don’t make sense to the world, that because of all this, I will know what TRUE joy is. That joy I have now? It’s NOTHING compared to what He has in store for me. Trials in this life will never end, but He conquers them all, many times unseen. There will be a Breakthrough.
I guess this is Sanctification.
Praying you all may experience that same Joy, though it may not be the same journey, His Love is the same.
What feels like warm summer nights #hahngardenseries #summer can’t believe it’s already may..where does the time go?
Everyone is broken.
All toil and all skill and work come from a man’s envy of his neighbor.
The clothes we’re wearing is not because we need them but because we want to be seen in them. We want to be noticed and the central focus. It’s a driving force in all of us. Everyone wants to stand in the center of their own universe.
We put on blinders to avoid our brokenness, burying ourselves in our work, play, etc to avoid the brokenness of the world.
Who hasn’t been wounded by someone else’s selfishness. No one.
In the middle of all of this, we need each other with Christ in the center.
If you ever try to heal the dark places, the part that leads you to the same crap over and over again, it’s a weighty and unbearable journey. Praise Christ for those that come along side of you.
Your blind spots, you can’t see it. Selah. Praise God for the ones that come up to us and tell us what they see wrong, love you enough to tell you.
-Notes from Matt Chandler’s podcast sermon on Ecclesiastes 4
"I’m a ridiculous, emotional, over-sentimental sap. I guess that’s why I told my wife I loved her on our second date.
I had tried really hard up to that point to hold it back, honestly. I wanted to tell her on the first date, but I knew that would probably be weird.
I still remember her…
I’m thankful my life is not led by chance as I am guilty of often thinking. God has planned every scene and plot out for the story of my life. He’s got everything under control when I do not. And I take solace and find joy in that, that I can rest in His strength.